5 No-Nos on a First Date (or any date for that matter!)
Even in today’s world, there are different rules for dating for guys and girls. Here are two lists – one for *chicks on the dating scene and one for *dudes (*I use these names for tongue-in-cheek purposes).
Men: If you’re looking for more than a string of one-night-stands, here’s a list of absolute-what-are-you-thinking things to do if you want to fail 1000 percent. I won’t guarantee anything, but I can almost bet my favorite coffee mug that you won’t even get to first base that night. (Some of these are light-hearted and some of them are serious…)
1. Do not ask the girl to meet you at a restaurant, join her, then tell her you don’t have any money, you don’t have a job, you’ve enjoyed living off food stamps for 10 years, and you never plan on working again, could she buy you a meal? Seriously, who does that? Yeah, a girlfriend of mine’s online date set-up did exactly that. Sick, right?
2. In a 2-and-a-half-hour date, don’t talk about the different sexual positions you and your ex enjoyed… in fact, don’t mention your ex… or sex. Oy.
3. If your date asks open-ended questions, don’t answer with monosyllabic/monotone replies. On the other end of the spectrum, please don’t speak rapidly with large words you memorized from the thesaurus – you’ll most likely sound like Hannibal Lecter and the odds are, you don’t look anything like Anthony Hopkins. This cannot end well for you. The menu will be a better conversationalist and you’ll get “emergency” ditched.
4. Don’t pull out your phone to show pictures of ___________(fill in the blank with kids, car, house, whatever) and flip through porn pictures your “friend” downloaded when he borrowed your phone. Chicks aren’t stupid, dude. Yuck.
5. Don’t ask when she’s ovulating next because “you feel your biological clock ticking and she’s not looking any younger”. That might inspire her to help you remove your baby making appendage. While babies appeal to some women, reminding them of their age appeals to less than zero – meaning even drag queens will revolt.
Women: Assuming you’re seeking the “one” to heal your injured heart, don’t, I’m SO serious, don’t do the five listed.
1. Pull out a measuring tape and start taking calculations for potential offspring with DNA attributes and family medical history OR tux sizes and cost. This is creepy. Just don’t.
2. Fart or burp. I’m all for equality, so this goes both ways – guys and girls, no one wants to think of bodily functions on the first date – it’s awkward and forces intimacy no one but your homies are ready for.
3. Don’t be the girl that says she’s not looking for anything committed when you’re actually looking for the mortgage and 2.5 kids. Be upfront. Nothing’s worse than having both people on the wrong page. He’s in it to tap that and you’re in it to say “I do.”
4. Don’t hide your smarts! Be proud that you’re well-read, can do math, etc. People aren’t looking for a ditz to be with forever. Talk about what you like – if it doesn’t go anywhere? Phew! You dodged a bullet!
5. Don’t measure your food at the restaurant because you’re on a diet and lost XX pounds. He doesn’t care. I’m serious. He thinks you’re hot how you are and doesn’t care that you like cheeseburgers enough to stalk them and you have the pizza delivery guy on speed-dial. In fact, a normal guy? Would probably think that was one of the hottest things about you! Well, not the phone number, but probably that he’s found a chick he can be himself with and she’ll be herself with him. Isn’t that what we’re all looking for? That best friend for forever?
One last serious note for both men and women.
· Don’t be guilted into anything you’re not ready for.
· Report anything that happens you didn’t consent to.
· Get out, if something doesn’t feel right.
Thank you so much for having me! Please add your tips for dating dos and don’ts below. I can’t wait to see what works and doesn’t work for you!
#1 When dating ends in deaths and threats, Molly might be better off staying single. During one of Molly’s weekly meet-ups with her girls at their regular bar, Molly succumbs to the duress of her two best friends and begins the aggressive dating they sign her up for online where the pairings are questionable... and dangerous. They’ve entered her in an evening of speed dating. But at the end of the evening she finds an item from her past that raises questions, grief... and danger.
When the number of deaths surpass Molly’s goodnight kisses, her past pushes into the present and Molly loses much more than she gains. A stalker has focused on Molly and refuses to let anyone else date her. But she refuses to be single for the rest of her life.
Is Molly doomed to a life of singledom wrapped in fear - or will the stalker turn on her
#2, Oh No, He Didn’t!
Molly is ready to meet up with her first date – Crisco Ethan. But first she has to survive threats at work and fear at home. Will Brad-the-bartender make a move or flirt from afar? The stalker is closing in and Molly has a terrible feeling she won’t stay untouched for long. Can she lean on Brad or is her heart pushing her toward danger?
#3 Dinner for Two
Getting ready to message her next date, Molly comes across an email from the stalker that might tear her apart. The aftereffects swallow her sanity and she struggles to stay in the everyday while battling the knowledge that he can find her anywhere. Nowhere is safe.
Is Brad as involved as circumstances suggest? Or is a man out there that wants nothing more than to keep her all to himself – dead or alive?
#4 Don’t Look Back!
At work, a special delivery slams home the seriousness of the situation. How many more lives will be affected by the man’s obsession with Molly? Molly’s stalker attacks close to home.
Can she find safety? Can anyone?
#5 Dirty Twist
The stakes are high and Molly has learned how desperate her stalker has made her. Tormented with more kidnappings and deaths, Molly searches for answers in all the wrong places. Will she find what she’s looking for? Or will her fear continue to paralyze her, leaving her open for the ultimate end?
#6 Check Mate
What precautions can a single girl take to protect herself from a sociopath? Why, move in with the crush and bring his ass in to play the game, of course. Even with all the bravado, Molly still learns she has a lot more to lose. Can she come back from the turmoil? Or is she doomed to misery for the rest of her short life?
#7 Last Chance
In a desperate attempt to save someone she cares about, Molly faces her would-be killer.
But who it is devastates her. If the killer has their way, Molly will die at their side.
Can Molly escape or will she finally be on a Date to Die for?
About the Author
Bonnie R. Paulson is all about survival. Do you have what it takes to turn the page?
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